#166 When "Yes" becomes "No, Not Yet"

Watch for it. When a yes is ready to transform, morph, change you and your life.  That's when it's time to hear, "No, Not Yet", and trust, believe, dream, hope.  

Transcript

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Welcome to the Lucides Podcast, where I explore everything. Because everything is connected to everything else. And I do believe in the infinite unbounded potential within each of us. Today I hope to do the shortest podcast ever. We'll see. But that is my goal. Simply because it just needs to be said. I don't believe it needs to be explained. I have said yes to singing for the last a dedicated yes to singing for the last three years. Yes to people who wanted me to sing at a birthday party. Yes to people who wanted me to sing at a funeral. Yes to people who wanted me to sing in the park. Yes to people who wanted me to sing in a church. Yes to people who wanted me to sing at an event. Just yes and yes and yes. Yes to people who just want to get together and collaborate. Just yes and yes and yes. And it felt good and it felt right and it felt wonderful. And recently, I would say I noticed it three months, two months ago, two or three months ago, the yes was a little bit wishy washy. I continued to say yes, but it was not the full-throated, full-bodied, full-hearted yes. And then in the last month, that yes has become weaker. And in the last two weeks, that yes is morphing fast to a no. But it's not a no, it's a not this. And I've thought about that. I've thought, but why not? You love to sing, you've loved Alice, you've loved, love, love. Something in me is saying, no, not this. No, not this. And so today, as I was sitting there, I was sitting here, I was just trying to feel what I because often I I want to explain the energetics of a situation. Not necessary, but it's my way of reassuring myself, honestly. And as I thought about it, the words came, that bucket is full. Like I have filled the yes bucket to everything. That one's full. I've learned so much, I've enjoyed it immensely. It's been wonderful. I have so much gratitude for it. Like nothing, there's nothing wrong or bad about it. And this is that moment where goodbyes can sometimes trip me up, and I think other people as well. Where my yes to everything bucket is full, and something inside of me is saying, no, not this. Wait. Wait. You will know your next yes. So I am finishing out the commitments I have with singing, and I have to say, I'm scared and I'm sad. I'm scared that nothing more will come my way. Isn't that interesting? All the connections and inroads and beauty that I've made with singing, and I'm so afraid that nothing more will come my way. Or I'm afraid the right thing, the thing that is correct for me, won't come my way. And I'm sad. I'm honestly sad to let go of the simplicity and the spontaneity of all of these yeses. And what I feel called for is something far more committed, dedicated. Um, I hate to use the word professional because that's not something I've been working toward, but that's what the word, that's the word that's coming. Um seen and heard, held and honored, which I've used those words a lot, but that's what's coming in this moment. So this is just to recognize when a yes becomes a no, comma, not yet. I often have thought when a yes became a no, it was the end, and I forgot that there was a comma and the words not yet. No, not yet. When a yes becomes a no, not yet. That is a powerful liminal space. It's scary and sad for me, and I've been doing my best to hold it, to believe in it, to trust it, to dream for it, to hope in it. Because I do know the power of liminal spaces. They are the connectors. The liminal spaces are the connectors. So precious, so sacred, so challenging. But they connect us from where we are to where we're going. And oftentimes I have checked out in those spaces because it was too much. The liminal space still connected me. But presence is so precious to me. Presence is so precious that I want to be aware of this liminal space. I want to be aware of my yes, morphing to a no, comma, not yet. There's something more, there's something different. I don't even know. I I couldn't even tell you it has anything to do with singing. It's just no not yet. Whatever is next. So, I like the number six, and we're just about to six minutes, and that's plenty. So, blessings to you who are ready to turn your yes, because it's happening to no not yet.